March 2011
13 posts
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I hate it when people smoke near me and I have to breathe their shit. When I do heroine I don’t inject them with a little bit every time I shoot up.
Before inventing daylight savings, Gary was a writer for the Twilight Zone:
“Everyone wakes up and the clocks are one hour later. Woooooo, eerie…”
“Stop pitching that.”
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Is Los Angeles Prepared for an Earthquake?
Watching Al Jazeera’s Japan earthquake coverage, I just heard that Los Angeles is a city that is considered to be well prepared for Earthquakes.
Um… have people been keeping some things from me? Because here are my steps if we ever have an earthquake:
Step 1: Yell “You guys feeling that?”
It’s always good to check with others to see if they are feeling the ground...
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“This is so embarrassing,” he said, “I was thinking of the seven deadly sins.” But he couldn’t stop now as he had already killed far too many people who were Happy, Sleepy, Bashful, Grumpy, Sneezy, Dopey, and Doctors.
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I look forward to the day when we can look back and say “Remember when no one knew Justin Bieber was a robot built to enslave society?” and then return to mining coal for our mechanic overlords.
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